The writer was drunk, and the editor high

I’ve been reading a lot of comics recently via Marvel’s Digital Comics. I mean, like a lot… 40 issues of New Avengers, 30+ Ultimate X-Men, Civil War, House of M, 30 of Runaways, World War Hulk and Ultimate Power. I can’t decide if I want to start on Ms Marvel, Immortal Iron Fist or Daredevil next.

I’ve seen some strange things in these reads. Things that make me bust out laughing and things that make me wonder if writers are well in the head. I give you an example from Ultimate Hulk Annual #1. First, there’s no ongoing Ultimate Hulk series, so how did he get an annual? Anyway, Hulk walks into what’s essentially an I-HOP (naked I might add) and proclaims ‘Hulk want pancakes!’

The way I see it, any reasonable waitress would do one of three things: 1) Faint 2) Run screaming in terror 3) Get the man some goddamn pancakes! No, this woman advises the (naked) Hulk, ‘No shoes, no shirt, no pants, no service’, whereupon the Hulk pulls out a wad of cash (from where, we don’t want to know) ‘Hulk has money, wants pancakes!’

At this point, Zarda (Princess Power from Squadron Supreme, herself slumming in the Ultimate Universe) who’s on a road trip decides to step in. See, in her world clothes suck and if she’s forced to get dressed by these silly humans then this big baby does too. Fight ensues and Zarda actually kicks Hulks ass. She drags his ass to the nearest Big & Tall store and get the man some pants. Then they both go get some pancakes.
There’s 2 more pages but it’s creepy so I wont comment.

My point is, writers are drunk and the editors who let this stuff slip by are high.

**Further examples include when Howard the Duck tried to register with S.H.I.E.L.D. after the Superhero Registration Act was passed into law.